“Mindfulness for supermothers” by Shonda Moralis

“Mindfulness for supermothers” by Shonda Moralis

“Mindfulness for Supermoms” is psychologist Shonda Moralis’ all-female book that teaches modern “multitasking” moms how they can take a break and fully enjoy all the things they do.

"Mindfulness for supermothers" by Shonda Moralis

What is the Mindfulness program for super mothers

” Your children will teach you something about yourself. They will teach you that you are capable of deep compassion and also that you are definitely not the evolved, calm, nice, competent and lucid person you imagined you were before you became a mother ” Shonda Moralis , author of book ” Mindfulness for Supermam ” (Il Punto d’Incontro publisher), as well as psychologist and psychotherapist, quotes Harriet Lerner not by chance. 

Daily life often leads, especially working women and multitasking mothers of the twenty-first century , to face the day on autopilot . 

In addition to being physically dangerous, it can also be a trigger for discontent and frustration that last over time, and, far from being exhausted, can lead to mental states and negative dispositions , such as passivity, inertia, anxiety and depression. 

The practice of “mindfulness” , understood as awareness and effective presence in what one is and what one does, can help change this state of affairs, bringing not only optimism and well-being, but also satisfaction, self-esteem, joy and gratitude for themselves and to share with children and partners. It is really worth taking the time to read this book because, page after page, you will learn how to put into practice simple and short daily mindfulness exercises . 

Five minutes of daily meditation

As Shonda Moralis relates, ” what I have repeatedly observed is that five minutes a day of meditation is enough to have clear and convincing results .”  The practice of mindfulness pushes us to distance ourselves from autopilot and invites us to be aware of what is happening in the “here and now”, in every moment of the day.

Being present means being present at 360 degrees, even in those moments when the children really make you lose your temper, but also when you have coffee, when you cook, when you do the laundry or wash the dishes, you fight the pillows. all together on the Latvian or end the day with a good glass of red wine. 

Read also Meditation, techniques and benefits >>

The grateful awakening

Starting the day in the right way is essential, also and above all for mothers, this is the first unquestionable starting point of the book.

Motherhood is ” chaotic and wonderful, exasperating and beatific” , but the point is that it is not talked about: the media shoot photos and videos of perfect and wonderful mothers, but in fact it is not like that. Doubts, moments of uncertainty, mistakes, difficult moments not only exist, but must also be shared , only in this way can you find support, complicity and union with other mothers or parents in general and overcome conflicts.

Sometimes even a few words are enough while changing the babies in the nursery to get some comfort and start the day on the right foot. Yes, because  saying thank you to the world and to life already when you open your eyes is a fundamental act of gratitude . Have you ever tried to indulge in a five-minute ritual to enjoy your first glorious sip of hot coffee? 

Daily connections with the family

The family becomes an exercise in patience and a practice of tolerance : in fact, fewer and fewer are in fact the moments in which a mother finds time to be alone with herself, even ten minutes to relax, to take a bath or a shower or simply to get the nail polish. Everything becomes a priority to be satisfied , unforeseen, a rupture of equilibrium and habits aimed at oneself.

And it is precisely here – precisely in the lapse of time that separates arriving at the end of the day, upset on the sofa, with a hot herbal tea in hand and feet on the table, and the scream that echoes like an implacable siren from the floor above – that one grows even more , learning that even during the annoying fraction of certain “special moments interrupted” by a cry, an awakening, a need, one can still continue one’s exercise of awareness and “meditation”.

Shonda is also ready to remind you that music, dance and game can dispel any bitterness in an instant!

Connections with themselves and with the world

In moments of greatest despair, when you see nothing on the horizon to cling to, when even putting mindfulness into practice becomes difficult, one thing remains, impassive as a certainty: time changes everything.

Through the words of the author and her personal life experience it is understood that it can be done worthily even in the face of very great pain, powerful sensations and periods of emotional exhaustion.

Regular practice of mindfulness can help because it offers important connections between oneself and the world , allows you to find, or rediscover, through a series of practical and simple daily exercises, that center that sometimes you can no longer feel, is a refuge. of tranquility, a place of silence and peace in the middle of the storm.

The right way to end the day

The conscious and gratitude-filled pause of the morning finds its counterpoint in the pause of the evening that materializes in the glass of wine . Sometimes, as Shonda sympathetically claims, coffee and wine are among the best maternal survival tools .

Then there is the summary and the story of the day: just before falling asleep, retracing what you did during the day turns out to be a very useful mindfulness exercise to give meaning and meaning to the life of the whole family.

All this can then be accompanied by an approach to the partner and a pause of conscious progressive muscular physical relaxation , contracting and then relaxing all the muscles of the body for five seconds, from those of the limbs to those of the face. 

“The agenda of awareness” concludes the book and invites you to mark, week by week, which are the moments of mindfulness that you have dedicated to yourself, marking the effects they have had on you.

Shonda Moralis is a PhD in Psychology and Social Work, a psychotherapist specializing in stress-related disorders and mindfulness-based therapy. She blogs Breathe, Mama Breathe in Psycology Today . 

He has created and offers minfulness courses and workshops for children, parents, teachers and students . She lives with her husband and two children in Pennsylvania.

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